Last Omegle Post of Mine

Hey guys,
This will be my last Omegle post, as I realize how old it can get. I would've stopped earlier, but this was just too good to pass up. Here it is!

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: by law I am requiered to tell you that I am a registered sex-offender

You: but thats not me anymore

You: please don't leave

You: don't be like the others

You: love me

You: where do you live

You: what your name

You: what are your parents names

You: do you have any pets

You: should I bring lube?

Stranger: 。。。。

You: please answer these questions as they are vital for maximum pleasure

You: iuhhhhhhhhhh i just came in my pants

You: did you feel the earth move?

You: My name is Henry.

Stranger: er...

You: and you?

Stranger: nice to meet u.henry

Stranger: my name is Did

You: what are your religous beliefs?

You: what the fuck kind of name is Did?!?!?!

You: are your parents fucking retarted

You: I think they were stoned when they named you

You: DID?!?!?!!? HA HA HA HA WHAT A FUCKING RETARTED NAME

You: jkjkjkjkjkjkj

Stranger: i think u have some problem in ur head

You: sorrry sorry

You: jkjkjkjkj

You: did is a cool name

You: im sorry that was a mistake

You: lets have make up sex in the back of my van

Stranger: hehe

You: im not kidding]

You: Where do you live?

Stranger: MAR

Stranger: MARS

You: I'm not fucking kidding

You: I want to have buttsex now

You: how old are you

You: are you a minor

You: how big is your penis

Stranger: so, i think u come from the MARS too

You: mars is hot, now tell me where you live and how big your penis is

You: it's okay don't be scared, im nice

Stranger: hehe

Stranger: where do u live

You: 34th street West Boulevard in Erie Pennsylvania

You: where do you live

You: how big is your penis??

Stranger: 34th street West Boulevard in Erie Pennsylvania

You: okay then walk out into the road and i'll pick you up in my van and we can go to the carnival

You: do you like carnivals??

Stranger: haha

You: ill bring you home in two hours i promise

You: don't tell your mom though

You: don't haha me, bitch

Stranger: tell my dad ,then

You: GET YOUR ASS IN THE FUCKING STREET AND HOP INTO MY VAN RIGHT NOW YOU FUCKING LITTLE KID!!!!

Stranger: or tell the police?

You: tee hee

You: send me a picture of your penis

You: but don't tell your parents or the cops

Stranger: why ?

You: because, it can be our little secret

You: :) tee hee

You: now come on I'm waiting but I don't see you

You: GET YOUR FUCKING LITTLE PUNK ASS IN THE STREET AND HOP INTO MY FUCKING VAN RIGHT NOW YOU LITTLE FAGGOT

You: I!!!!!!!!!

You: tee hee :)

You: talk dirty to me

You: but don't tell your parents

You: that 10 year jail term was long and hard

Stranger: hehe

You: DON'T FUCKING HEHE ME YOU LITTLE PUNKASS FAGGOT, GET IN MY VAN!!!!! OR I WILL COME FOR YOU

You: tee hee

Stranger: i think u may enjoy living in the jail

You: no, no no non

You: I can't go back to jail

You: PLEEASEE, PLEASE PLEASE

You: DON'T SEND ME TO JAIL!!!!

You: you don't know what they'll do to me in jail

You: they do bad things

You: things I was planning on doing to you in my van

You: tee hee

You: giggle giggle

You: BONER

Stranger: really~

You: yes, really.\

You: i can see it now

You: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PENIS IN YOUR BUTTCRACK
Your Conversational Partner Has Disconnected
Love, Teamfoot
Props to Ese